Moravian Lives @ Moravian U

1

The Course of life of the Single Sister Isable Render who departed
to our Sav^r July 25^th 1777 in the Oeconomy at Littlemore, and has left
the following account of herself:

I was born at Leeds Sep^r 9^th 1756, and baptiz'd by the B^rn my Parents took
me frequently with them to the meetings kept by the B^rn where I had the opportunity of
hearing of our Sav^r and his love to poor Sinners, which I lik'd very much at first: but as I
grew older, I grew ashamed of belonging to the B^rn, and wou'd rather have gone to other
meeting places, that I might have more time to spend with my Companions, but my Parents
who were resolv'd (if possible) to bring me up for our Sav^r, carefully prevented every thing
which might have been hurtfull to me, as much as laid in their power. In my 12^th Year
I got the small pox, and as I was likely to die, I was fill'd with great fear thinking I shou'd
not be sav'd if I did, but I pray'd to our Sav^r that I might get better at this time, and
promis'd that I waou'd live for him, and he own'd me in a particular manner, and gave me the
assurance that I shou'd get better and that he wou'd make me happy in him, ever after
that time, I lik'd very much to attend the meetings at Fulneck and always when I got
home, and recollected her I had seen the S^rs there; I felt a great desire to go and live with
them. March 25^th 1769 I was receiv'd into the G Girls Choir, at which time I was very
happy thinking I shou'd soon go and live with the S^rs, which I did for Ap^r 29 following
when I came here to the Oeconomy at Littlemoor, where I was soon at home and in my
element, August 13^th that same year, I had the unexpected favour to be recd into the Congⁿ
which bowed me before our Sav^r and I rejoic'd at my election of grace to be number'd
with his People, I went on chearfully for sometime, but when our Sav^r shew'd me my
natural depravity in some measure I was a little surpriz'd, that after I had experienced
his love in my heart, I shou'd still find things arise in me which was contrary to his h^rt
and mind, but he gave me the grace to speak openheartedly with my S^rs which always
prov'd a comfort, and an abiding blessing to me, and I learn'd to know myself as a poor
sinner, yet as one that found favour in the sight of my d^r Sav^r who's comforts were never
a wanting, when I turn'd to him in my distress, May 19^th 1770 I was a Spectator at the
H: Communion for the first time, the impression of what I then felt did not soon leave
me: the time of my being Candidate was a particular time of schooling for my poor h^rt
but I lost in a great measure the blessing of being openhearted, which together with
which I felt of my own misery, made me very uneasy; I wanted very much to feel my
Sins forgiven by our Sav^r but as I constantly strove in my own way for it, I was
kept dark good while, and did not know what to do once thought, it made no
matter me staying any longer with the S^rs I might as will go from which _whence I came
for our Sav^r was no more to me as he had been, I went on thus

2

heavy for some time; but on New Years Night-watch following, our Sav^r drew near
to my h^rt and let me feel that he wou'd yet bring me to a clearness in him, if I did
but keep close to him, this comforted me, and I grew more chearfull, and now my
longing to enjoy him sacramentally increas'd, which desire was granted me Oct^r 6^th 1771
after which time I was very happy and chearfull in my h^rt and liv'd in a close conexion
with our Sav^r daily rejoicing at my happy lot of grace, to be in fellowship with his
People, and what added to my happiness was, that many of my Choir companions enjoy'd
the same blessings with me, with whome occasionally I kept many hearty bands about
my own h^rt and our Sav^rs kind dealings with me, such opportunitys were a real strength-
ning and support to me, and that time shall never forget; when many of my companions
enter'd into the S. S^rs Choir I was very much pain'd, as I thereby lost the nearest
fellowship with them, which had been of so great importance to me, but our Sav^r let
me feel that my greatest interest was in him, and that he wou'd never fail me.
Now tho' I had enjoy'd so much from our Sav^r Yet it never rightly left my mind
that I had not as yet experienced his Pardon and forgiveness so clearly as I wish'd
to do which which I consider'd it made me very uneasy, Yet as I had often strove for
it, and made myself miserable, I was resolv'd to leave it intirely to our Sav^r to do it
in his own way, and when he pleased, for I had that confidence in him, that he knew
my desire, and also how to grant it when he thought best; and one day during the
preaching I was led to cast my eyes upon our Sav^r, as bleeding and dying on my
account, and what an interview I then had, can never be express'd in words, I felt
full pardon was merited for me, and everlasting peace and happiness in the blood of
my redeemer. May 4^th 1774 I was rec'd into the S Sis^rs Choir, which
was a particular day of blessing for me, especially when I feasted myself upon his
Corpse and Blood in the Choir-Communion, and I devoted myself anew to him, that
he might fit and prepare me according to his own heart and mind, and pray'd him
to give me his blessing in this Choir also, that he might have some pleasure in me
for all what he had undergone on my account, and it has always been my prayer to
him that he wou'd rather take me to himself; than suffer me to be unfaithfull to him.

So far her own Words

Since her reception into the S. S^rs Choir our Sav^r has been very busy in
discovering to her, her inate corruption, which for want of confidence in him made
her at times very heavy, and as she pondered over it in herself a good while

3

before she disclos'd the state of her h^rt to her Labouris, she was thereby greatly
oppress'd, some of her companions percieving it, wou'd gladly have comforted her, to whom
she said that she felt more than she knew how to come thro' with, and if she did not
soon find ease, her burden wou'd be greater than she cou'd bear, but at length our Sav^r
gave her grace to cast herself at his feet just as she was, and she again was com-
forted thro' the merits of her bleeding Redeemer, after which she said, she enjoy'd a
truely sabbatic time for her own h^rt last December she got a bad cold and Cough
from which she never rightly recover'd, tho' several means were made use of for that
purpose, which prov'd ineffectual, when in Ap^r last, symtoms of a Consumption
appear'd, she was at first not willing to think of going home so soon, but said she
wou'd be glad to get better at this time. it was very painfull to her, when on account
of the cold weather she was obliged to miss the meetings in the passion week, but on the
last Choir Festival she said that every thing was made up to her, what she had enjoy'd
from her best friend on that day, wou'd never be forgot by her: and after that time it
was very perceptible that it was our Sav^rs intention soon to hasten his work with her
which she herself also begun to think, and express'd herself concerning it, to this purpose
I have had many bands, with our Sav^r about going home, and I believe if he takes me
at this time, tis out of love to me, in order to preserve me for himself & perhaps
he foresees if I remain below, that I shall prove unfaithfull to him, and because
I believe he will do with me what he thinks best, I have therefore resign'd myself to
him, he has already done much for me, and I believe he will help me thro' till my end.
in this happy resignation she remain'd till her last, and often spoke about the happiness
of her heart, a few days before her departure she grew a little anxious for fear her
time wou'd be long, and she was perceiv'd to converse with our Sav^r on that hand, and pray'd
him to give her patience to wait his time, and that he wou'd also bring it soon to pass, after
which she told those about her, that our Sav^r had given her an intimation that he wou'd
soon fetch her to himself, for which (said she) I am vary thankfull, in the night of the 23^d
of July a great Alteration was perciev'd in her, and in the morning (finding herself
worse) she ask'd the S^r who attended her, if she was not alter'd; being answer'd in the
afirmative, she said, our Savr be prais'd for it, now I shall soon see him face to face,
which she repeated to all who went to see her, she was throughout she whole day so uncom-
mon chearfull that it was a pleasure to be near her: once, seeing a good many standing
by her, she said, don't you see how happy and chearfull I am? and don't you feel how near
our Sav^r is? O how gracious is he to me, that he is now going to take me to himself to
secure me from all harm, he has now taken away all old things, and between him and me
there is nothing remaining, she farther added, I love you all d^r S^rs very much, and when
my last moments comes, I shall like some of you to be present, and help to keep the

4

Liturgy at my departure, what a moment well that be, You will then feel how near
our Sav^r will be and many more such declarations were given by her, too many to insert
here; so much we can say with thankfulness to our Sav^r that his peace was so devinely
felt, that it was accompanied with blessings to all who were near her, she has already
told us, that she thought to day wou'd to her last, if not to day (said she) tomorrow,
which accordingly came to pass: early in the morning on the 25^th she desir'd to have the
watchword and Childrens verse read for that day; at hearing she latter she smil'd and
wanted to hear it again, the verse was, Altho unable to express the tender
feelings of my h^rt by love constrain'd I'll sing and praise my bleeding friend
till I depart, she said tis very suitable for my going home to day. those who watch with
her the last night, ask'd her to tell them, if she knew when she was going, which she promis'd
she wou'd, accordingly about 4 in the morning, she said, I am now going, and signify'd that
she wanted to be blest for her departure, which was done by her Choir helper during
a feeling Liturgy according as she desir'd. when that verse was sung. Now thou
Sister hold dear and tender 'fore her h^rt display thy splendor, she herself join'd
in the last lines. Draw it in that cave cave made for it Soul and Body there
be buried. being ask'd if the singing shou'd be continue'd, she answer'd, O yes, and soon
after she said, how is it that I am here yet, but was soon pacify'd when she was told, that
in a few moments all wou'd be well: and soon after 8 she expir'd softly and happily
in the 21^st Year of her Age.